An Invitation to Hate Us More

I recently sat through an agonizing 30-second video of Whoopi Goldberg boo-hooing about a Rush Limbaugh comment. First, let me say that Rush Limbaugh makes me sick, too. I don’t know which fat, used-to-be-funny, obnoxious, blow-hard, has-been is harder to listen to – Goldberg or Limbaugh, but I have to say that for once…just this once…I hope Limbaugh is right.

Limbaugh’s comment was regarding the idea of pairing up Clinton and Obama on the same ticket as President and Vice President. He made a comment that a black man and a female running together meant, “they don’t have a chance”. Goldberg was highly offended and went into one of her typical diatribes about how being raised in the United States affords her the right to be anything or do anything she wants. Whatever.

The truth is – being born/raised in the United States only affords us the privilege to PURSUE those dreams – not to achieve them. Achieving success is entirely up to us – and our ability to overcome the obstacles that are in our way, but that’s not really what I sat down to rant about…

I have long since confessed that I don’t believe the United States is ready for a female President. And I don’t just mean the citizens are not ready – I mean the country and the world is not ready for the fall-out that will undoubtedly be tied to putting a woman in the White House.

As an American girl, I was raised with the same “girls can do anything boys can do” sermons as anyone else. I have achieved a lot in my life and can honestly say that I have not been held back by man or beast. I have a lot to be proud of, but I’ve worked hard. Nevertheless, I still don’t believe a woman is the right person for the job of President of the United States and it has nothing to do with a woman’s ability to lead. It has everything to do with the responsibilities that the President of the United States has not only to America, but to the rest of the world.

To those of you who do not believe there is such a thing as a “War on Terror”, you might want to plug your ears for the rest of this.

Notwithstanding my position that the Commander and Chief of our Armed Forces should be required to have served in the armed forces – let me just pose a question…

What do hate-mongering Muslims hate at least as much as they hate the United States?

If you guessed WOMEN – we’re on the same page.

Am I the only person who believes that the very idea of Hillary Clinton in the White House is going to antagonize the already horrific situation the Unites States is in with regard to terrorists who hate us? With all that’s happened in the post 9/11 era – diplomacy is more difficult to obtain than ever. What are the odds that an arrogant female is going to get a diplomatic round-table discussion going with a group of Sunni’s and Shiite’s? How about NONE. Absolutely NO CHANCE.

So, let me get this straight… The plan is to put a female in the White House who claims to be against the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan (but that’s only after she voted for those wars), let her remove troops from the middle east (although not nearly as quickly as our friend Barack Hussein Obama would do it if given the chance) and then perch the sitting duck up there on Capital Hill as though the United States is looking for a way to become more of a target than we already are. Do I have that right?

Great plan, folks. And just how is she planning to communicate with the terrorists? Shake her finger at them? Cry?

Fortunately, Limbaugh is probably right on this one. I’ve felt from the gate that whomever wins the candidacy on the left is going to be an easy opponent for the right to beat – based solely on the good old fashioned racism, fear and sexism that still exists in this country. We can say what we want about how far we’ve come with civil rights (and as far as I’m concerned – we’ve gone TOO FAR on most fronts), but the truth of the matter is – there are an awful lot of closet racists and sexists out there – and for once, I hope they’re registered to vote. If not, being offended by a blowhard will be the least of Whoopi Goldberg’s worries. She’ll have plenty to think about while she’s picking out which veil goes best with her jiibab.

Well, aint that just dandy?!?!?

Hat tip - Neo-Contastic

Campaign Finance Reform - PI Mom Style

I am sick to death of hearing about how much money the candidates have raised and spent on their election campaigns. As far as I’m concerned, it’s a complete and utter waste of money and all of them should be ashamed of themselves.

We hear them all talking about campaign finance reform whenever they’re mad that someone else raised more money than they did – how about some good, old fashioned, REAL campaigning. How about a shoestring budget and some blood, sweat and tears?? How about spending campaign contributions on things that REALLY matter?? How about that, eh?

Here’s my proposal.

The NEW Rules of Campaigning:

1. Candidates must choose the “platform of choice” that they consider to be the most important issue – you know, the one they promise to fix as soon as they’re finished redecorating the Lincoln Bedroom.

For the sake of an “example” – let’s use Hillary’s platform….Socialized….err, “Universal” Healthcare

2. Candidates may accept as much or as little contributions as they see fit during campaign.
3. $1,000 of campaign funds may be used to fund the campaign each month. The rest of the funds must be donated to the cause of their “platform of choice” – assuming the platform allows for the money to stay in the United States. If not – the money goes into a natural disaster fund that will be used to help rebuild AMERICAN cities after hurricanes, floods, fires, mudslides, etc.

For the sake of an example – how many uninsured people could receive healthcare for $138,048,905 (Hillary’s total receipts as of the end of January 08).

4. Candidates must solicit free advertising from the media – which would eliminate the argument about which way each of the media outlets lean and force organizations like the New York Times to publicly choose a candidate.
5. Candidates may work the talk-show circuit, but they may not be paid for their appearances.
6. No television commercials may be aired, unless they are free.
7. The monthly $1,000 may be spent in any way (except for television commercials), including billboards, yard signs, bumper stickers or picket signs, but those who acquire them must purchase them from campaign headquarters and the money goes back into the kitty for next month. People buy bumper stickers and yard signs for their favorite football teams and any other nonsense they litter their lawns with – why should these items be free?
8. Neither the Democratic or Republican National Committee may pay any television network for advertising or for debate time. The networks can solicit sponsors. Coca Cola pays American Idol an insane amount of money just to place their cups on the judge’s table each week. The networks will get by on sponsorship!
9. All campaign employees must be un-paid volunteers.
10. Candidates must drive wherever they go. The Government can continue to provide cars and secret service (most of them would have it anyway, since they already work for the government), but if the candidate’s “platform of choice” has anything to do with the environment, the candidate must travel in a sub-compact hybrid.
11. If the candidate works for the United States Government, they must take an official, un-paid leave of absence from their job. If I wanted to campaign for something, I would have to take off work without pay – why should we be paying them for a job they clearly are not performing while they campaign?
12. And last, but certainly not least – candidates must spend at least 50% of their time knocking on doors and meeting the American public – you know, the very people they ask for votes from. This shouldn’t be a problem – they can just stop in the neighborhoods they’re driving through.

As of the end of January, the total money raised (according to CNN) by ALL candidates, from both sides (including the drop-outs) was $650,239,992.

How many neighborhoods in New Orleans do you suppose could have been rebuilt with 650 million dollars?

End of an era

The last REAL American hero died today. Evel Knievel....the legend....
The professional athletes and musicians that the kids these days look up to - they're all pansies compared to Evel Knievel. More than 40 broken bones with no steroids, no gazillion dollar contracts.....just raw manhood, guts and a little bit of crazy.
I'm so depressed.
Elvis....Ronald Reagan...now Evel Knievel. I may as well just crawl in a hole and wait for the blaze of Glory.

Paleeeez!

Isn't it funny how people "find God" when it's a politically effective strategy in a Presidential race? Good God!

From the AP...

In a rare public discussion of her husband's
infidelity, Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton said Monday that she probably could not have gotten through her marital troubles without relying on her faith in God.

"I am very grateful that I had a grounding in faith that gave me the courage and the strength to do what I thought was right, regardless of what the world thought," Clinton said during a forum where the three leading Democratic presidential candidates talked about faith and values.

"I'm not sure I would have gotten through it without my faith," she said.

I think I just threw up in my mouth.

Oh C'Mon!

Ok - lemme get this straight….

We have to put up with museums, public school curriculum, television, radio, books and crackpots whose theories slap the face of every Christian in this country - but let someone open a Creationism Museum and there are
fruit loops standing outside on opening day - picketing the visitors because they believe it ignores science...per Comcast News.

If you're going to be in Kentucky (or Cincinnati), support this place!

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In other nonsense....err news...

I PREDICTED THIS...

On April 21st, during a trip to Memphis, I predicted that the fat pig #2, Rosie O'Donnell was becoming such a liability to Barbara Walters that she would have to get her off that stupid show, The View. Less than a week later - she announced she would be leaving (of her own accord...yeah, right!). Then she kept running her flap and couldn't keep the job until her planned mid-June departure date.
Not that any of you actually KNEW I predicted it - and Lisa is the only one who can verify it - but I did. So, this is my "told-ya-so" on that subject. I don't get to say it often, so I'm taking advantage of this one.

Now....to get fat pig #1, Michael Moore, to mysteriously disappear....hmmmm......

Let's Just Copy & Paste Mexico's Immigration Policy

I like Allan Wall's take on the Mexican Immigration Policy. We could take a lesson or two from Mexico. What was the golden rule?? Do unto others.....

Check it out

Give me a break

Just a few things that have tickled me today...

Carter says the Bush administration is the "the worst in history" in international relations.

That’s really weighty stuff coming from the worst President in history - relative to any subject or relations.

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Danny Glover: Can’t we deport him for this???

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And last, but certainly not least - considering the size of this big FAT PIG...
What happened to the IRS investigating the fat pig, Michael Moore, for unauthorized trips to Cuba related to financial gain?

His zombies are thanking him now and "sicko" is a very good description for all of them.

His latest aim is the US healthcare industry. That’s my back yard. It may be interesting to see what lies he’s come up with for this one. Then again, it may be more interesting to watch someone pull his toenails out.

Home of the Brave....via Paradise.

I just returned from vacation and those who know me will be expecting my usual suitcase full of wise-cracks and sarcasm that trips outside the United States bring out of me.

My girls and I travelled to Jamaica and let me first say we had an excellent time and we will undoubtedly return. I love the Caribbean and what it does for my attitude...not to mention the tone of my skin. I'm not planning to rant about our stay....it was glorious!

This trip, we had the unusual ?luck? of being in Ocho Rios during the World Cup Cricket matches. Now, forget that I think cricket is a pansy game and forget that the hair stands up on the back of my neck when someone (like our airport shuttle driver) says, "it's just like baseball!" and forget that it's so boring that when forced to watch it I start fantasizing about using that club/bat/stick used to bunt the ball to crack people in a 1970's style high-school paddling. This really isn't about cricket - although I could go on all night. No - the only interesting thing about being in Jamaica during this tournament was that the Pakistani cricket team was there - playing this pansy game against the West Indies, Zimbabwe and Ireland.

So, the day we were leaving, I'm watching these sheep herders in their long beards and little pansy cricket helmets bounce balls to each other and while the camera is panning around the stadium I couldn't help but notice the crazy number of "fans" these people had with them and the thought occurs to me - how in the name of anything sacred are these people hopping on planes to go to Jamaica? I mean, at the risk of sounding like the politically incorrect person that I am - shouldn't it be really, REEEEEALLLLY hard for people from that region to travel the world right now? Excuse me while I clear my throat.......ahem.....and say, "YES!"

Suddenly I recalled the day we arrived and how incredibly easy it was to slide into the little island of Jamaica without so much as a baggage check. Immigration was nothing - and I do mean NOTHING. No scanning of our passports, not even a second look at my youngest daughter who looks nothing like her passport photo and certainly no questions.

Then, there was Customs.

Customs Guy:"How many bags, mon?"
PIMom: 5
Customs Guy: "Welcome to Jamaica"

End of Customs

And let me clear something up right now....
We might be three very white girls from Pennsylvania, but the olive skinned, Arabic speaking couple in line ahead of us got the same Q&A and freedom to cruise on into the country.

Fast forward past the sunscreen, the kayaking, the waterfalls and the countless banana drinks with little umbrellas....

Now it's the day to go home. The sky is blue and there is a beautiful breeze (of course there is because the most beautiful day of the year is always the day you're going home!). We pile our bags into the airport shuttle and take the 2 hour hike back to the airport. When we arrive expecting the usual scrutiny that accompanies leaving a foreign country and returning to the United States (I swear the airport people take it out on Americans), what do you suppose happened?? I'll give you a hint....it starts with N and ends with ING.....NOTHING, folks. A BIG FAT NOTHING. No baggage check, no questions, no forms, no x-ray machines....not even so much as a peek into my shoe bag.

So, I'm standing there watching the sheep herders bunt the little ball on the TV screen next to the "security check point" and it occurs to me......What a great way to enter the United States....no....questions....asked. And what a great place to be standing in line behind a bunch of people who look like "freedom fighters". Yeah - it's a beautiful day in paradise.

At least they can't actually GET IN to the United States, right?

When I returned to the Philadelphia airport, we went through Immigration along with a number of foreigners with passports that may or may not be legitimate (would the minimum-wage-earning immigration "clerks" really know the difference?) and then headed to customs, which is usually a zoo and a huge pain in the rear while greasy people paw through my luggage. Guess what, folks??? There was nobody in the Customs area. Just a couple of security guards standing in the hallway leading out of the area. One of them held his hand out for the customs declaration card we filled out on the plane while the other stared at my boobs. I never showed anyone my luggage. I didn't go through an x-ray machine, nor did my bags. I could have had a bag full of explosives, cash or Bob Marley smoke...and nobody cared.

It's nice to know that the good ole' boys at the Department of Homeland Security are "keepin' it irie". If I was curious whether we are doing enough to keep the bad guys out - I'm not anymore.

In case of inclement weather

The PI Mom hasn't disappeared. I've just been in a cold induced hibernation for the last several weeks. Single digits and even some sub-zero temperatures have slowed the old Mom to a crawl on most days and sucked the energy right out of me. I'm definitely not a good candidate for living in South Central Pennsylvania - what with all the temperatures below 75 degrees....but family ties and the circumstances of my life to date have dictated this curse I call my geographical location.

I usually don't know what's on my schedule without writing it down in three places and then ultimately having my administrative assistant read it off the calendar, but I know this.....
One day I will be trading in my business suits, power pumps and sensible sedan for a sarong, flip flops and convertible. White, sandy beaches are in my future....oh yeah....

Meanwhile, we had the first day of "warm" weather today in weeks - with temperatures at 42 degrees it felt like a heat wave. The problem is that behind the warm temperatures is a winter storm heading toward SC PA.

Now, I was born in the mountains. I may hate the cold and the snow, but it doesn't scare me - not in the least. On the contrary, those born and raised here in the "flat lands" are a bunch of crying, screaming mimi's! I've never been able to figure out why all the bread and milk disappear from the convenience stores whenever the weather man predicts even the smallest of flurries. What do people do...sit around and eat toast when it snows?

The weather man has predicted a "storm" with accumulations of up to 6 inches. SIX INCHES folks! That's barely enough to make tracks in the snow. I'm pretty sure that the first time I drove a car there was at least 6 inches of snow on the road - I remember because it was a GOOD weather day in the mountains. Honestly....I realize I am more than a little politically incorrect and perhaps a little judgmental and maybe even somewhat unsympathetic....but I really had to restrain myself when 4 of the managers who work for me sent me e-mails today asking for help in developing an "Inclement Weather Plan" for this week.

It was, of course, the easiest task I performed all day and here it is:

February 12, 2007
Inclement Weather Policy for XXXXXXXX Site of XXXXXXXX Management Group
Policy:
If it snows less than 2 feet....get your butt to work.

If you're looking for me during the storm - try me at the office.